Cell Phone Text Jokes!

OK we all have either sent or received a Joke or two on our cell phones via Text Messaging.

I decided to have a place where you can find these jokes to use or at least laugh at.

If you are easily offended PLEASE STOP READING NOW and get off my page!! Some jokes are racist and some are sexist! I am neither! So please DO NOT send me any hate mail! This is merely a collection of Text messages that float around everyday!

I will most likely update this list every week or maybe every day who knows!

And yes I now spelling and grammer are not correct this is how the messages are appearing in text messages!

This list can be found on it’s own page on this blog at http://thevariant.wordpress.com/cell-phone-text-messages/. Bookmark it to keep up with the full list!

The Jokes:

1. y is orgasm a 6 letter word? Cuz its easier 2 spell then Ohmygodyesohshitdeeperyesgodpleaseohfuckyes.
2. U r a great friend but if killers were chasing us…I’d trip ur ass & run. It’s all bout survival bitch!
3. Teacher asked johnny ‘why did u bring ur cat 2 school today?’ Johnny (cryin) ‘I heard daddy tell mommy im gonna eat that pussy when the kids leave.’
4. A cat falls in a pool, a rooster laughs. Moral of the story: A wet pussy makes a cock happy.
5. A girl asks her mom, “if u swallow sperm, is that how u get pregnant?” Mom says “no baby, thats how u pay the rent!”
6. A cop stops a hooker and tells her she cant be selling sex. The hooker says im not selling sex. Im selling condoms with a free demo!
7. I had a dream you were drowning and I couldn’t save you, then God appeared and said “fear not my child, turds float!”
8. The US gov decided that in 2009 they will ship all retards away. I started crying when i thought of you. Be strong little buddy. Wear a helmet!!